Are Title's Really Necessary or Are They Just Ruining Relationships?
Truth is reader: I really didn't want to respond to this because my opinion is really something that most men agree with and majority women are going to hate me for saying, however, you asked and my responsibility is to answer and because you're awesome I'm going to respond. ha-ha okay so here's what I think.....
If you just started dating- If your relationship is nowhere near matured yet, it probably hasn't been going on very long, MAYBE just a few months or less; I believe that these are the beginning stages of getting to know an individual. For this reason, be clear with each others intentions and ask what they are looking for in each other, Are "we" getting to know each other so that we can eventually produce a better relationship? Are "we" seeing other people? Are "we" just going to do things for fun? Are "we" going to just go with the flow? Do "we" want things to eventually escalate? BE CAREFUL, how you approach this question to the person you are dating because it can either scare them away from you, rush things or confuse things. So NO, at this point you don't need a title. Let nature take its course and continue getting to know each other before moving too fast. Refer to my previous blog- "Don't rush the relationship, Get to Know each other." I think that as long as you come to an agreement that is compromising to the both of you and you agree to a way of doing things then, baby steps.
If You've Been Dating For Almost A Year or Over- Baby steps at this point with not even a boyfriend/girlfriend reference might be pushing it a little too long. I know if your committed to that person and only seeing that person then a title isn't necessary, but a boyfriend/girlfriend title is comfort to a lot of people. You see security with the title and a larger respect for each other. You no longer become that person the he/she is messing with, but you end up someone he/she is proud to call her man or his woman. They want to show you off and feel comfortable doing it. So, my suggestion at this point of the relationship, determine if your boyfriend/girlfriend or move on. Don't mislead the other person for a whole year either, because it does take a lifetime before you can actually get to know someone fully, so waiting for that I don't know him/her well enough excuse might be a dumb idea and you should let them move on if you were never interested in a serious relationship to begin with.
You are Boyfriend/Girlfriend- If you've only been bf/gf for a year, don't rush to the alter.. I've said this before. There is no rush in this. TO many it is just a piece of paper that proves the unity of two people binding their love together and to others its a way of proving their commitment to each other. I think, that a marriage is a complicated subject because I have contradicting opinions at times. Sometimes, I believe a marriage gets to peoples heads and let that ruin their relationship. Others, appreciate the marriage to live their lives together the way they always have. Many cases a baby, possibility of losing each other, legalization, loneliness, fear, and soft vulnerable hearts rush people to the alter and most likely end in divorce. Like I have said previously and I will repeat to you is that, let things just happen. If your love is large enough and marriage is something that occurs because you naturally want to spend the rest of your life with someone, and will work hard enough to save that marriage through anything, then great. But make sure your not doing it just for the title.
Finally, are titles necessary? In the beginning, No. All it does at the first stages is ruin relationships because your so focused on the title your forget about learning the great things about each other. After a few years or so have passed, then Yes. You can't be just a friend with benefits that long.
Yours Truly,
xoxoxoxox
V
If You've Been Dating For Almost A Year or Over- Baby steps at this point with not even a boyfriend/girlfriend reference might be pushing it a little too long. I know if your committed to that person and only seeing that person then a title isn't necessary, but a boyfriend/girlfriend title is comfort to a lot of people. You see security with the title and a larger respect for each other. You no longer become that person the he/she is messing with, but you end up someone he/she is proud to call her man or his woman. They want to show you off and feel comfortable doing it. So, my suggestion at this point of the relationship, determine if your boyfriend/girlfriend or move on. Don't mislead the other person for a whole year either, because it does take a lifetime before you can actually get to know someone fully, so waiting for that I don't know him/her well enough excuse might be a dumb idea and you should let them move on if you were never interested in a serious relationship to begin with.
You are Boyfriend/Girlfriend- If you've only been bf/gf for a year, don't rush to the alter.. I've said this before. There is no rush in this. TO many it is just a piece of paper that proves the unity of two people binding their love together and to others its a way of proving their commitment to each other. I think, that a marriage is a complicated subject because I have contradicting opinions at times. Sometimes, I believe a marriage gets to peoples heads and let that ruin their relationship. Others, appreciate the marriage to live their lives together the way they always have. Many cases a baby, possibility of losing each other, legalization, loneliness, fear, and soft vulnerable hearts rush people to the alter and most likely end in divorce. Like I have said previously and I will repeat to you is that, let things just happen. If your love is large enough and marriage is something that occurs because you naturally want to spend the rest of your life with someone, and will work hard enough to save that marriage through anything, then great. But make sure your not doing it just for the title.
Finally, are titles necessary? In the beginning, No. All it does at the first stages is ruin relationships because your so focused on the title your forget about learning the great things about each other. After a few years or so have passed, then Yes. You can't be just a friend with benefits that long.
Yours Truly,
xoxoxoxox
V
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