Family Intervenes With Your Relationship? What happens when they can't agree?

Through experience and the stories of many of my loved ones, when a family gets in the middle of a relationship, someone needs to put their foot down or get over it. 

The truth is: When the family gets involved with your relationship 90% of the time, it probably isn't going to work. The reasons are clear, someone is too afraid to speak up and let themselves be lead by the decisions of others or your not grown enough to handle your own situations. I'm going to approach this from two different perspectives, the person being driven by the family and the person who was "victimized" by the other family.

First of all, when your family really dislikes someone you are dating it's your responsibility of how you handle the situation. It completely depends on how you feel about the individual. Its simple, if you truly care and or love this person, screw what your family says. You need to fight for the person you care about no matter what anyone says about them. In any situation it honestly doesn't matter what the reasonings are. Stand up for what you believe is best for you. In the end nobody's feelings matter but your own, so if your too naive or prideful to determine who you should agree with, you just might lose the person who's meant to spend the rest of your life with you. Do not let your parents/siblings/cousins/aunts etc... come into your relationship and tell you how to do things, when to do them, whats right and/or wrong. It's none of their business, especially if your a man! Dude, MAN UP! Stand up for your woman and don't allow anyone to disrespect your relationship just because they believe your life should be lived the way they think is true.

As for the person being "victimized" don't and I repeat DON'T allow yourself to be contained nor controlled in this relationship. If the other persons family is over interactive or simply just NOSY  say something. Either to your boyfriend/girlfriend or the family who gives way too much opinion that isn't needed. If it doesn't change and it becomes something your significant other isn't stepping up to the plate to protect, then leave. Try to move far away from them, limit family phone calls and learn how to separate your love life from your family life.

Now, if your both just in a relationship where the only problem is disapproval and it is clear that you are both in love. Don't pull a Romeo and Juliet and kill yourself, but escape that and talk it out with your families and if they are unable to deal with it, then simply their problem and its time to live your life. I do not encourage Teens to this same advice, I am suggesting this to grown individuals clearly seeking to be comforted with someone who they genuinely and sincerely care about.

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Yours Truly,

XOXO

Vivian